Posts Tagged ‘pk’


Wednesday, March 28th, 2012 more»

Me and Stefan Themerson

Friday, February 24th, 2012

I do not know why I am writing this because I have no answers. For the life of me I do not know why I am obsessed with Stefan Themerson. I do but it is mundane and I would have to stop writing after the word love.

When I first read Stefan Themerson I threw Stefan Themerson, not out of the window, not against the wall, not into the fire, we had no fire, when I was a kid we had a coal fire and my older brother thought it marvelous that objects, mainly my objects, toys and the like, melted on the hot coals and turned the flames from orange to blue, down and proclaimed loudly, shocking my wife, who at the time was my girlfriend, that for the life of me I have no idea what the hell that book was about. I had just finished Stefan Themerson’s The Mystery of the Sardine. The energy I had spent on Stefan Themerson’s The Mystery of the Sardine I could have used to climb a mountain. I have never climbed a mountain. I suffer acrophobia and also vertigo. (I stole this) “Vertigo is often used (incorrectly) to describe a fear of heights, but it is more accurately a spinning sensation that occurs when one is not actually spinning. It can be triggered by looking down from a high place, or by looking straight up at a high place or tall object, but this alone does not describe vertigo.” When I first went to Chicago I had to get on my hands and knees and crawl down Michigan Ave. I felt very silly and very sick. I had just consumed three slices of Chicago (pie) style pizza and my belly was sagging and dragging along the pavement. (more…) more»

Paul Kavanagh on Iceberg

Thursday, February 16th, 2012

With the release of Iceberg, Paul Kavanagh’s second book, we thought we’d ask the great man a few more questions.

Iceberg is very different to The Killing of a Bank Manager
Paul Kavanagh: I wanted Iceberg to be a fast and fun read. I wanted to use a conventional style, I didn’t want to tax the reader, I wanted the read itself to be pleasurable. My intention with The Killing of a Bank Manager was to make the read as onerous as the character’s journey. I wanted each footstep the character took on his journey to murder to be extremely difficult for the reader, the psychology of the character to be matched by the paragraphs, sentences, and those long, obscure words. I wanted the reader’s journey to mirror Henry’s journey. Iceberg is the antithesis to The Killing of a Bank Manager in style; nevertheless, I have my fun. (more…) more»

Junk Trip

Saturday, January 14th, 2012

The junky has to survive for the junky trip to succeed. And so the junk trip has to be short. The shorter the trip the more likely the junky will succeed. The junk trip is all about success, without success the junk trip is futile, a waste of time and effort. The junk trip should be no more than a day or two, a long weekend at the most. During this time the junky must keep a clear head and observe with Proustian fastidiousness the mechanics of the junk trip. It is advisable for the junky if he intends to succeed not to partake in junk. (more…) more»

A Christmas Tale or How I Learned to Love Bono

Saturday, December 24th, 2011

It was late and I was on the bus going home. The bus stopped and a family of shoeless, homeless, emaciated, wretched fools climbed on to the bus, but they didn’t have the fare and so the bus driver sent them back out into the snow – it was snowing. A lady next to me tapped me on the shoulder and softly, coquettishly said, “Well tonight, thank God it’s them instead of you!” (more…) more»

do not read this, sing it!

Tuesday, December 20th, 2011

do not read this, sing it!

it’s useless unless unless unless it moves you. like beating drums, like beating screwdrivers, like beating your bishop, like beating the homeless. Nothing beats like beating the homeless. And if the homeless is a girl with a family problem it’s wonderful! (more…) more»

(An Advertisement)

Wednesday, December 7th, 2011

I have a big cock. I had to get that out of the way first. On paper it is easy, but in the real world it is very hard. I have a twenty-seven-inch cock. An old girlfriend called it The Onion. I was very proud of the name. Many years later I found out she called it the Onion because of the smell. I always thought she named it The Onion because it brought a tear to her eye. (more…) more»


Monday, November 21st, 2011

This is a warning do not read this piece to your child to your dog to your cat if the child’s the dog’s the cat’s head explodes at the dénouement I will feel guilty. (more…) more»

I Love Technology, Part II

Sunday, October 30th, 2011

It’s just my luck. It’s got to happen. You know it and I know it. It’s happened twice. But you know and I know that some day it will happen for real. Whatever we invent we have to use, the bone, the stick, the axe, the sword, the machine gun, the raygun. (more…) more»

I Love Technology

Monday, October 17th, 2011

My grandfather died before the video. He would have loved the video. He was a dirty old man. (more…) more»